Wednesday, March 4, 2015

In Memory of My Mom

Barbara Ann Byers
My mom went on The Long Walk Home on February 15, 2015.  It came on rather unexpectedly, but then again...when do we ever expect it?  I was there for her.
I'm glad I quit my job and had the time to spend with her in the last month and a half.  I had a feeling somewhere deep inside that I needed to be home for my family.  She told me the week before she passed away that she was glad I was home and could spend time with her.  She said she was beginning to feel like a "red headed step child" while I was at that job.  No time for anyone or anything.  I'm glad I got to make her feel loved and welcome again.  I have decided that from now on, family comes first.  When I go back to work, it will be for someone that understands that.
I've had a lot of feelings the past two weeks.  I've had to step up and contact family.  I've had to handle her affairs.  I've never had to deal with this before.  And for the first time, I don't have her here to help me.  Even to just call and have her listen to my silly fears and concerns. To have her say "Let's go buy some thread."
I kept her sewing machines and gadgets.  I kept the yarn that she was gathering for an crocheted project she was going to do for me (yes, I do that too.) I did request that my brother donate her stash of fabric to the Veteran's Auxiliary.  She loved the quilts that she received while in the hospital at the VA and I couldn't think of something more meaningful to pass on her passion to.  I thought about keeping it for myself, but would probably spend too  much time crying over quilting.  They will have hundreds of comfort quilts out of her stash to bring smiles to Veterans for a long time coming.  That's good stuff.
I miss her.
But I am working on being okay with letting her go.
Happy Journey's to All.


canuckquilter said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad you had time to spend with her the last little while. *hugs*

Marsha B said...

Kathleen, I am so sorry to hear of your Mothers passing. It is good you were able to spend so much time with her over the last weeks of her life, you will always have good memories of the time you spent with her. I hope you find comfort and peace with all those good memories.

---"Love" said...

Losing our mother is one of the hardest things any of us have to go through. Treasure the time you spent with her in her last days with you. Always remember the good times you had with her through your life; that will help to lift your spirit. (But you will always miss her --- (from a voice of experience). ---"Love"

Cynthia said...

So sorry to hear about your mom! I'm glad you got to spend extra time with her in the last couple months! You'll be in my prayers.

a good yarn said...

My heartfelt sympathies Kathleen. Nothing I write can lessen your grief or sense of loss. Your mother was obviously a very positive force in your life.

Beth said...

Hugs. So glad that you had that time with your Mom. So sorry for your loss.

Ruth said...

My sympathies are with you at this time. The time you spent with her at the end of her life meant a lot to both of you and that will give you comfort as something to be thankful for.

Katie said...

I've been thinking of you and your family. I saw your posts on facebook, but just didn't know what to say that seemed adequate. Still don't. I'm glad you got to spend time with her and have a few of her things to make you smile and hope that time and family will ease your grief. Big hugs!